Mondrian's Blog

[Stephynbouby]

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other.

[Stephynbouby]

Today's selection is Protocol which runs in the 6:15 race at Tipperary. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 7/1 or less.

As usual, I'll post the results after the race.

[Stephynbouby]

Today's selection is Protocol which runs in the 6:15 race at Tipperary. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 7/1 or less.

As usual, I'll post the results after the race.

... and Protocol gets sent off at 5/1 and so was a bet - which was just as well since our selection came nowhere and we collected.

Here's the stats:

Number of Tips: 59
Number of No Bets: 36

Winning Bets: 17
Losing Bets: 6

Strike Rate: 73.91%

Profit/Loss: £1.25

Return on Investment: 5.44%

The above is based on a £1 stake and 5% commission.

It's still early days with the system.

On the morrow, malchicks.

[Stephynbouby]

Windows vs. Ford

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Bill's comments, Ford issued a press release stating:

If Ford had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving
cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash ......... twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy
a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would
have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the
car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For
some reason you would simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your
car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable,
five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five
percent of the roads.

6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be
replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning
light.

7. The airbag system would ask, "Are you sure?" before deploying.

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and
refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle,
turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how
to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the
same manner as the old car.

10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.

PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call "customer
service" in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign
language how to fix your car yourself!!!!

[Stephynbouby]

After a flurry of activity yesterday, it's back to:

There are no selections today.

On the morrow, malchicks.

[Stephynbouby]

IN RESPONSE TO THE E-MAILS CONCERNING MY DOG

Please be advised I am sick and tired of receiving emails about my dog who mauled six illegal immigrants, four lawyers, nine teenagers with pants hanging down past their cracks, eight customer service desk people, three flag burners and five estate agents.


FOR THE LAST TIME...


IT’S NOT FOR SALE.

[Stephynbouby]

There are no selections today.

On the morrow, malchicks.

[Stephynbouby]

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

[Stephynbouby]

There are two selections today.

The first runs in the 5:35 race at Kilbeggan. It is Killarney Lakes. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 4/1 or less.

The second runs in the 7:45 race at Kilbeggan. It is King's Wharf. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 9/2 or less.

As usual, I'll post the results after the race.

[Stephynbouby]

There are two selections today.

The first runs in the 5:35 race at Kilbeggan. It is Killarney Lakes. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 4/1 or less.

The second runs in the 7:45 race at Kilbeggan. It is King's Wharf. Lay it to lose only if the odds close to the off are 9/2 or less.

As usual, I'll post the results after the race.

... and Killarney Laks gets sent off at 9/2 and so was a no bet - which was a pity because it finished 3rd and we would have won our bet and we would have collected.

... and King's Wharf gets sent off at 9/1 and so was a no bet - which was a pity because it didn't even place and we would have won our bet and we would have collected.

Here's the stats:

Number of Tips: 61
Number of No Bets: 38

Winning Bets: 17
Losing Bets: 6

Strike Rate: 73.91%

Profit/Loss: £1.25

Return on Investment: 5.44%

The above is based on a £1 stake and 5% commission.

It's still early days with the system.

On the morrow, malchicks.

[Stephynbouby]

His request approved, the CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight.

He was told a twin-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.

Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger.

He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, 'Let's go'.

The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off.

Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, 'Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fires on the hillsides.'

'Why?' asked the pilot.

'Because I'm a photographer for CNN' , he responded, 'and I need to get some close up shots.'

The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered, 'So, what you're telling me, is . . . You're NOT my flight instructor?

[Stephynbouby]

There are no selections today.

On the morrow, malchicks.

[Stephynbouby]

An old German Shepherd starts chasing rabbits and before long, discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a panther heading rapidly in his direction with the intention of having him for lunch.

The old German Shepherd thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep now!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the panther is about to leap, the old German Shepherd exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious panther! I wonder, if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the young panther halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

"Whew!," says the panther, "That was close! That old German Shepherd nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a squirrel who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the panther. So, off he goes.

The squirrel soon catches up with the panther, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the panther.

The young panther is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, squirrel, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!"

Now, the old German Shepherd sees the panther coming with the squirrel on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?," but instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old German Shepherd says...

"Where's that squirrel? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another panther!"

Moral of this story...

Don't mess with the old dogs... Age and skill will always overcome youth and treachery!

BS and brilliance only come with age and experience.

[Stephynbouby]

Today's selection is Gran Canaria Queen which runs in the 3:35 race at Ripon. Lay it to lose if the odds are 5/1 or less.

[Stephynbouby]

Today's selection is Gran Canaria Queen which runs in the 3:35 race at Ripon. Lay it to lose if the odds are 5/1 or less.

... and Gran Canaria Queen drifts out to 8/1 and didn't even place. Pity it wasn't a bet due to the drift.

Here's the stats:

Number of Tips: 62
Number of No Bets: 39

Winning Bets: 17
Losing Bets: 6

Strike Rate: 73.91%

Profit/Loss: £1.25

Return on Investment: 5.44%

The above is based on a £1 stake and 5% commission.

It's still early days with the system.

On the morrow, malchicks.